Another Way to Praise

Engaged listening is an effective way to recognize an individual’s outstanding efforts and contributions. Simply listening and then responding to the speaker with admiration for their work leaves the speaker feeling recognized and valued.

When people feel valued for their efforts they tend to work harder and accomplish more. In short, asking about their work and then listening attentively to our colleagues and employees describe their efforts is a boost to their morale and motivation.

Below is a method that encourages someone to talk about a recent accomplishment and guides the conversation towards uncovering what motivates them to go above and beyond.

The act of engaged listening leaves the speaker feeling appreciated and the listener feeling a little wiser.

How it works

When you hear about or witness another person’s accomplishment ask them about it using the questions below.

1.     What did you do that helped you successfully fill in the task /accomplishment?

 The first question asks them what they did to ensure their success.

2.     What else did you do to help it succeed?

People are modest and reluctant to “toot their horn.” Ask a second time.

3.     Did you run into any problems? How did you overcome them?

4.      What did you enjoy about ________________ (the accomplishment)

Note: You ask these 4 questions and if needed, ask clarifying questions. You don’t add anything to the conversation. Your job is to listen and appreciate their accomplishment.

As an example, you notice one of your team members handled a difficult conversation in a meeting (a tough customer or another employee).

You might open the conversation with a statement such as:

Jody, I sat in on your presentation to the board this morning. I could tell the presentation was well received and you handled some challenging questions from some difficult people. What did you do that helped you to be so successful?

I use this technique in personal and professional relationships.

I am often awe struck by how the act of listening deeply is profoundly appreciated by the speaker and brings a little joy into someone’s life.

Give it a try!